You can't take nothing from me. As the tears pour down my face my stomach turns at the thought of ever losing my family. Throughout the years of my life I have lived carelessly. Endangering my life, my reckless mind state, could have never prepared me for the feelings I have in my heart. Life never felt so real until Nov 27, 2007, when Bianca Bougere was born. I was admitted into the hospital shortly after my water broke. They induced my labor and the morning of Nov. 27th they had me pushing for over 6 hours. I felt something was wrong and with the inability to feel my legs and thighs but all of the pressure of bianca going the wrong way. I begged for a doctor to check me out and then they realized she was stuck in my pelvis during the contractions. They rush me to the operating room where they had to perform an emergency c-section. As the anesthesiologist already messed up my epidural they had to put me under because I could feel the incision. I finally wake up and slowly get to meet my angel Bianca Richelle Bougere, as I look at her my family explains her dis figuration. Her face paralyzed her ears bent her skull smashed in I feared for her life. Drugged up the doctors try to talk quickly and compassion less, and inform me that my daughter might not ever be able to hear or see and be paralyzed for life. I cried in richs arms because I couldn't understand what I had done wrong in my life to have my child unhealthy. But God showed me his truth and His light. We exited the hospital 4 days later and she was able to see and hear. Eventually the paralysis wore off and the God in her shined through very quickly. A week after being released from the hospital, I started to notice that my body wouldn't stop shaking. I went into the hospital and the doctors immediately noticed something was wrong. My heart rate was the same as my daughters 150, for an adult that was dangerously high. Overworked and overgrown my heart became and they had to shut it down before it gave out on me. They gave me a shot and within that instant I cried I was dying my heart wasn't pumping I couldn't breather my eyesight became blurred I felt it all coming to an end. But that wasn't all God had for me, my journey had just began to take me from this earth. My heart restarted and dropped to 120 still dangerously high, they knew my chances were better, because of the rate dropped. Within the next several months I met with numerous doctors, had heart surgery, that never cured my heart disease, and took many meds. Two years later I am still alive after facing death repeatedly my life and everyone I care about, finally made sense. Lifes meaning was so apparent I feared riding in the car because life could be so easily taken I didn't want to risk it. I wrote this with two things on my mind, life and the people you cherish most, never take them for granted, nothing is ever promised, but our faith in God always keeps us in his favor. Never give up for you don't know what God has in store for us. Don't forget to appreciate your life,no matter what hand you were dealt, God would never give you more then you could ever handle
Friday, November 27, 2009
You can't take nothing from me. As the tears pour down my face my stomach turns at the thought of ever losing my family. Throughout the years of my life I have lived carelessly. Endangering my life, my reckless mind state, could have never prepared me for the feelings I have in my heart. Life never felt so real until Nov 27, 2007, when Bianca Bougere was born. I was admitted into the hospital shortly after my water broke. They induced my labor and the morning of Nov. 27th they had me pushing for over 6 hours. I felt something was wrong and with the inability to feel my legs and thighs but all of the pressure of bianca going the wrong way. I begged for a doctor to check me out and then they realized she was stuck in my pelvis during the contractions. They rush me to the operating room where they had to perform an emergency c-section. As the anesthesiologist already messed up my epidural they had to put me under because I could feel the incision. I finally wake up and slowly get to meet my angel Bianca Richelle Bougere, as I look at her my family explains her dis figuration. Her face paralyzed her ears bent her skull smashed in I feared for her life. Drugged up the doctors try to talk quickly and compassion less, and inform me that my daughter might not ever be able to hear or see and be paralyzed for life. I cried in richs arms because I couldn't understand what I had done wrong in my life to have my child unhealthy. But God showed me his truth and His light. We exited the hospital 4 days later and she was able to see and hear. Eventually the paralysis wore off and the God in her shined through very quickly. A week after being released from the hospital, I started to notice that my body wouldn't stop shaking. I went into the hospital and the doctors immediately noticed something was wrong. My heart rate was the same as my daughters 150, for an adult that was dangerously high. Overworked and overgrown my heart became and they had to shut it down before it gave out on me. They gave me a shot and within that instant I cried I was dying my heart wasn't pumping I couldn't breather my eyesight became blurred I felt it all coming to an end. But that wasn't all God had for me, my journey had just began to take me from this earth. My heart restarted and dropped to 120 still dangerously high, they knew my chances were better, because of the rate dropped. Within the next several months I met with numerous doctors, had heart surgery, that never cured my heart disease, and took many meds. Two years later I am still alive after facing death repeatedly my life and everyone I care about, finally made sense. Lifes meaning was so apparent I feared riding in the car because life could be so easily taken I didn't want to risk it. I wrote this with two things on my mind, life and the people you cherish most, never take them for granted, nothing is ever promised, but our faith in God always keeps us in his favor. Never give up for you don't know what God has in store for us. Don't forget to appreciate your life,no matter what hand you were dealt, God would never give you more then you could ever handle
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